Apr 302011
Ever wondered why you (erm… almost) quit the last time?
It’s actually NOT you…, being a bad player.
It’s the Law of Murphy crawling in your account. So let’s begin explaining.
KQs First.
- Barely managed to enter the KQ.
- … but you forgot to restone and you are short on potions.
- … and you have to die 3 times and restone/repot.
- You wait alone for the next KQ.
- You wait 30 minute.
- Alone.
- Not a single person on the whole map.
- Of course It fails to begin.
- Your guildmate entered the first KQ and exited with Victory and blue item.
- You manage to enter the KQ but there are NOT enough people to finish the boss.
- You are the only tank and there are no clerics.
- … or there are clerics, but they fight and die instead of healing.
- They die exactly 3 times before the boss fight and quit the KQ.
- … or they refuse to heal and call you n00b.
- … or they don’t speak English.
- … and the few words they know are STFU, GTFO and all variations of n00b.
- … and they adore annoying you.
- The only cleric knowing what’s expected of him is AFK, because his mom is calling him for dinner.
- … he arrives in the end, but enters different party.
- … and/or refuses to heal and revive you.
- There are only clerics in the KQ.
- … including yourself.
- There are only mages in the KQ.
- … and you are one single lousy fighter or ranger.
- Everything is alright and none of the above is true but:
- … noone is inviting you to party.
- … and/or you DC.
- You never manage to make the last blow when you need boss-kill quest.
- … neither anyone in your party.
- … and all of you actually needed this.
- … and no one shouted “Let our party make the kill”.
- … or no one listened.
- … or someone from other party said “Ooops, sorry”.
- You level Up, before being able to enter the KQ again to kill the boss.
PVP KQs are even better.
- Morning PVP KQ is having 4-th and 5-th person entering in the last 1 minute before start.
- … or it is just You. Alone. And everyone in your guild sleeps.
- … or is not high enough to enter.
- The PVP roster says you are first. But in the end you are third.
- Everyone wants to AFK the PVP when you want to duel.
- Everyone is AFK when you have bad connection and frequent DCs.
- If you want to AFK to grab some cheap XP, you DC 100% of the time.
- … or the PvP bugs and leaves you without XP.
- … or the PvP bugs and DCs everyone.
- When you manage to get your connection back, the PVP is over
- … or you are taken to Elderine/Uruga before it’s over.
- … or you are locked out alone in the PvP room.
- … and the GMs are still sleeping.
- You are the first to die when you are buffed to the teeth, because that guild you hate too much is team-mobbing you.
- … or It’s your own wife/husband, backstabbing you with 2-3 critts. (Hi hun, missed me?)
- You managed to get the hammer half second before 3 rangers gang-bang-power-shot you.
- You managed to get the hammer but You forgot to use speed scroll.
- Everyone else is having Speed Scroll III.
Party? What’s that?
- No one is around when you need party.
- The only ppl willing to party you are low level XP leachers.
- (They even offer money. 10 silver :D)
- The most profitable party quests and dungeons are hardest to find party for.
- You have good party, but all paladins are … in Narnia.
- In a rough fight, your healer always falls first.
- … and you following him of course.
- … or you all died, but he hasn’t put a single Skill point in Revive cast time.
- … and you are all 5 maps away from city.
- … and no one is married to anyone, so he/she can use Summon.
- … and there is a level 105 priest from warring guild gloating around you.
- … not willing to help of course.
- Everyone in your party needs his bladder size checked by a physician.
- … or buy a catheter and link it to the WC.
- … or learn not to write “AFK”, when she actually plans to read a chapter from Narnia in the WC.
- When you get something good, everyone wants it.
- … for his alt.
- … or for his friend he promised to.
- Every time there is a good drop for your own class, you either don’t need it, have better or outleveled it long ago.
- … and can’t fetch a good price.
- All the good drops are not for your class.
- … and/or your alt is still to low.
- … and/or someone else wants it.
- Every time you almost found all your quest drops/kills, you get ditched by your party.
- … because everyone else’s already found them.
- … or because there is TV show starting somewhere.
- … or because it’s dinner time in that part of the world.
Soloing. For whoever has the nerves.
- The map is never empty.
- If it was empty five minutes later it’s not.
- … there is high level ranger with full party of newbies for Power leveling.
- … I really mean FULL party.
- Suddenly, they need the same quest drops.
- … or just pretend to.
- You are stalked by a newbie player with party invitations and begging.
- … when you finally accept, just to make him stop he enters his mushroom and goes AFK.
- … or even asks you to level him a bit while he eats breakfast.
- … and he has NOT the same quests, so you can have his drops too.
- You are stalked by a KS idiot who claims it’s “his map”.
- You are stalked by some “Certified yellow bar clicking expert” who gathers all herbs and ores before you.
- … and loves to gloat.
- You die.
- … you shout “Please revive @ B4, 2 minutes”
- … and there is no cleric in the same map.
- … or she is level 19 and does not have revive.
- … or arrives too late.
- … or asks for 100 silver.
- You are really PISSED TO DEATH but all of the above are members of Exhibition guilds.
- … or you are not Admin.
- … or your guild master is away/offline/in Narnia/wherever.
- … and suddenly a GM pops of nowhere and says you should calm down or he will ban you for 1 day.
Trade. Or midday’s robbery.
- Your spot is always taken by some spam bot or a newbie selling tier 1 potions.
- You have a full inventory and no one is buying your stuff.
- You entered one less zero on an item evaluated to 900 silver.
- You sold an item evaluated at 9 gold for a merely 9 copper, because you did not click the right box.
- You sold your own +9 weapon because you equipped some cheap level 10 to show off.
- … To a NPC.
- Your overpriced scrolls are never in demand.
- When they are in demand, you actually under priced them already
- … and someone bought all 5 stacks.
- … for coppers.
- Some idiot is selling the same as you on half price.
- … beside your mushroom
- … and is actually named his shop “Cheaper than him”
- Your guild master started a Guildwar while you were in shop.
- … and of course you were killed.
- … and again.
- … and again.
- … and few more times in the respawn area.
- … And the GMs were not around.
Game masters. The.
- When you really need them, they are … in Narnia.
- When you are killed in your shop, they are … in Narnia.
- When you are killed in respawn area, they are … in Narnia.
- When there are scammers in marketplace, they are … in Narnia.
- When there are gold selling spam bots in the market, they are … in Narnia.
- When you are in need to kill the Mini Dragon, all 3 of the GMs entered the KQ too.
- …, to check what’s buggy with the rewards.
- … and of course refuse to fight the MD or buff anyone.
- When you are unfair in Guildwar, they are … badger chewing your ancle.
- When you have killed someone in shop, they are … badger chewing your ancle.
- When someone provoke you, they are … badger chewing your ancle.
- When you accidentally kill someone in respawn area, they are … badger chewing your ancle.
2 Responses to “Fiesta Online’s own Murphy Laws.”
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i was looking for someone commenting on the pros and cons of being a ranger but dissapointedly i came across this. But damn that is some funny sh!t. i <3 nubs who troll the shout chat 24/7 the most….forgot to mention tht one xD
True, true.
Read my ingame’s wife FeatherAmy Ranger tutorial in our old forum. She did quite a good job – http://wiki.redemptionguild.eu/index.php/Archer_Guide